Everybody just calm the fuck down!

I decided to jump on the current bandwagon, and instead of discussing the current, popular series The Hunger Games - even though it contains lots of violence, and throw my two cents into the online discussions on the just as violent but not in the same ways Fifty Shades of Grey by E. L. James.

Originally made as a Twilight fan fiction, this book has captured the attention (and lusty dreams) of women everywhere. Why not? It has sexy main characters, and more importantly lots of sex.

I started reading it as a lark. I wanted to see what all the fuss (both for and against) this book. Why were people in love with it? Why did people hate it? Being honest, I wanted a completely out there silly read and I wasn't disappointed. My favorite line in the book? "I don't make love, Anastasia. I fuck. Hard." So ridiculously bad it's good. It promises lots of sex, and it delivers.

It's easy to see the parallels between the main characters of this book and Twilight. Brooding, too handsome, powerful man. Klutzy, ordinary, doesn't know how beautiful she is woman that every other woman can identify with. And it has lots of sex. Kinky sex. Rough sex. Mmmm. Sex. Women love reading about sex as much as men love surfing the internet for weird porn.

The reason this book has polarized the erotic literary world is the Dominant / Submissive rolls depicted in this book. Women arguing that this books sets women's rights behind fifty years, women arguing that feminine power is all about the right to give that up to the person of their choosing, women arguing that unhealthy ideals about sexual power come from growing up in a society that forces them to be submissive. There's just a whole lotta arguing. Over sex. Fictional sex. Is that the most important thing we can do with our time these days?

What do I know about BDSM? It's "Safe, sane and consensual" sex, in which the submissive does hold their own power, despite how it looks outwardly. That it's about mutual respect, pushing boundaries, and it has its flaws too. Ultimately, whether you play in that realm or not, D/s sex is fun to think about. Obviously, or this book wouldn't be so wildly popular. So is all sorts of sex. Pirate sex, alien sex, werewolf sex, robot sex, public sex, gay sex, sex in cars, sex WITH cars, sea monster sex, lumberjack sex. Does that mean you want to be abducted by pirates, and made to have sex with lumberjacks in public? Not necessarily. (If you do - please call me!) One of the most popular types of erotic fiction being devoured is male on male sex. Women eat this up! Is it because they secretly want to be a gay man? Is it because they want to share their bed with two men more interested in each other than themselves? Or is it because women love romance and sex in all the various forms they can get their hands on? Sex and fantasy is fun. Just because so many women turned on by rough, dominating sex doesn't mean they want to give their free will up in a sexual contract. (Because seriously, it's just like marriage. Once you sign on the dotted line, all the fun is gone.) Fifty Shades of Grey succeeds in offering women a titillating view into a fantasy world, and that's as much that should be read into this books' popularity.

I love reading about true crime and serial killers and unicorns and zombies and (gasp!) yes, even zombie SEX. Does that mean I want to commit crimes and murders and turn myself into a zombie and have sex with other zombies? Of course not. That idea is preposterous. So why are so many people up in arms that so many women are having fun fantasizing about the D/s dynamic and rough sex? It could foster discussions about their own sexuality, desires, wants, and might even spice up the bedroom. Isn't that why we read erotica in the first place?

What harm is there in healthy fantasy? Absolutely none. The world should just calm the fuck down. I'm going back to my dungeon to read some more. Come join me when you're ready. Wear that sexy alien mask and bring my favorite flogger. I'll be waiting...